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Day 11, Gravitation, (PG/PG-13)
We're almost done! Just one more day left! Today has been a very bad day (my arm hurts a lot because of the shots I get in my elbow) so I'm very happy to have anything at all for you—hmm, maybe I should have worked harder yesterday and cheated today? But my family helped me a great deal as I wrote this; by the end, I felt just like Eiri!
Christmas, Snipers, Snapping
"Yuki!" Shuichi planted his fists on his hips. "You have to go! It's your sister's party!"
Eiri flicked the ashes from the end of his cigarette and stared at the TV. "So?"
"I have to go!" Shuichi wailed, dropping against him dramatically. "Don't you wanna go with me, Yuki? It's Christmas Eve! A night for lovers! The most romantic night of the year!"
Eiri elbowed Shuichi's head to the side. "I hate Christmas," he said and took a long drink of beer. "And it's not Mika's party; it's an N-G event. I don't have to go."
"We could hold hands and you could kiss me under the mistletoe!"
Eiri set his beer can on Shuichi's head. "Not for two million yen," he said. "And I wouldn't go to the party, either."
Shuichi snuggled up to him. "I rented tuxedos," he said, doodling idle patterns on Eiri's chest with a fingertip. "We could help each other get dressed."
"Mm." Eiri removed his beer can and tipped his face up. "I guess I could help you get naked," he said against his mouth.
---
"Don't. You. Move." Shuichi purred, sliding up Eiri's naked body. "I'm going to prepare myself for you so close your eyes and get ready." He slithered off the bed and, double checking that Eiri's eyes were closed, reached stealthily for the tuxedo pants. "Are you ready…Yuki?" He stopped, staring at the empty bed.
"Thanks for the B-J, brat," Eiri said from behind him.
Shuichi turned around. "Yuki!" he wailed at his fully dressed lover.
Eiri, in his slightly-rumpled slacks and button-down shirt, smirked at him. "I'm going to go have a beer and watch porn while you're at Tohma's."
"Yuki!" Shuichi threw a pillow at him. "YUKI!" he screeched as the door to the bedroom blasted inward, squishing his lover to the floor.
"Aha!" said K, popping in through the smoking wreckage. "Nakano! I've secured Shindou," he said in to a walkie-talkie, scooping Shuichi up under his arm and blowing a hole in the wall behind the bed. "We're on our way to you." He put the walkie away. "As manager," K said, sounding perfectly sane, "it's my job to make sure you're not late to this important function."
He threw Shuichi into the back seat of the convertible idling in front of the house. "I'll be right back!"
"Hi, Shuichi," said Hiro, scooting over to make room.
"You're naked," said Suguru, shielding his eyes.
"That'll make a statement," said Eiri, wearing his tux and getting into the front seat.
"Yuki!" Shuichi threw himself into his lover's lap. "You're coming with!"
---
Thirty seconds earlier, in the bedroom…
"Eiri Yuki?" K asked.
Yuki lit a cigarette off the flaming door-hole. "Yeah?"
"Message from your sister," K said, un-holstering his pistol. "You come with me or she comes to get you herself.
"Fuck," said Eiri.
---
"I'm not going to do you in front of your friends," Eiri said, peeling him off and throwing him into the backseat. "Not without two million yen first," he said, looking at Suguru and Hiro over his glasses.
"God, no!"
"Not on me, sorry."
"Ack!" Shuichi clutched a pillow over his groin. "K, I'm naked!"
K gunned the engine. "Can't be helped, little man! We're running late."
He peeled away from the curb with a squeal of tires and the smell of burning rubber. "I brought him clothes," said Hiro, holding up a tuxedo. "Just in case."
"You'll make a good manager some day, Nakano," K said. "Fujisaki, take the wheel!" he ordered, climbing into the backseat.
"I can't drive!" Suguru shouted, lunging over the back of the seat and grabbing the wheel anyhow.
K stuffed Shuichi into his pants as Hiro poked his arms down the shirt sleeves. "Can't be helped, littler man!" K said. "There's a button on the wheel that controls the missile launcher—shoot anything that gets in our way."
"K-san!" Suguru squeaked. Then, "Oh, thank god! We're slowing down!"
"Go faster!" K said, choking Shuichi with his bowtie.
Suguru laughed fearfully. "I can't reach the pedals!" He kicked his feet, still dangling over the back of the front seat, for emphasis.
K put his revolver to Suguru's temple. "Faster."
Eiri blew out a cloud of smoke and slid his foot over, stepping on the gas. "Better?" he asked as Suguru shrieked.
"Good enough!" K said, climbing back into the driver's seat and cranking the wheel hard over to the left, flipping the car over and rolling it across Tohma's lawn. It landed right-side-up at the front door. K kicked his door off and grabbed the members of Bad Luck out of the back, setting them on the doorstep.
Shuichi was smoking faintly.
Hiro looked like he'd been put through a wind-tunnel.
Suguru was only standing because K was holding him up.
Eiri slouched up the walk, unruffled, and rang the bell.
Tohma opened the door. "Eiri!" he said delightedly. "You're early!"
---
"One day, Mika," Eiri said to his sister. "One day, I'll get you for this."
Mika sipped her drink and smirked at him over the rim of the glass. "Now, now, Eiri," she said mildly, smirking even more. "A lot of publishing contacts are here tonight, too. It's not just about music. Why don't you mingle? Or dance?"
"I'd rather die. I'd rather kill you," Eiri said, glaring at the crowded room.
"Eiri Yuki! My dear, it's been too long," simpered some matronly woman, giving his rear end an obvious leer.
He grabbed Mika's arm, stole her drink, knocked it back, and gave the older woman a charming smile. "It'll have to be while longer, I'm afraid; my sister insists that I dance with her."
---
"It plugs in just like this, got it? And then you don't need me and Tohma to play for you, see?"
"Yay! It's singing time!"
"Yay! Singing time! Singing time!"
"Yay!"
"Yay! Yayyayyay!"
---
"Kill it." Eiri stared at his lover and Sakuma Ryuichi as they sang along to some horrible piece of piped-in bubblegum pop.
"Oh, come on, they're both renown vocalists, Eiri," Tohma said with a smile. "There's no harm in them commandeering the karaoke machine. In fact, it's probably good for business."
Eiri ignored him, clutching the stem of his wineglass until his knuckles went white. "Kill it, Tohma."
---
Across the room at the karaoke machine...
"Pussycat Pussycat I've got flowers
and lots of hours to spent with you
So go and powder your sweet little Pussycat nose
Pussycat Pussycat I love you yes I do
you and your pussycat nose
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"Claude, honey?"
"Yeah, baby?" K scouted the room, rifle in hand.
"There seems to be a back up by the karaoke machine and I can't get through this door to stand under the mistletoe with a certain gun-toting husband of mine!" Judy giggled coyly.
---
Back by the karaoke machine…
"Pussycat Pussycat you're so thrilling
and I'm so willing to care for you
So go and make up your big little pussycat eyes
Pussycat Pussycat I love you yes I do
you and your pussycat eyes"
"What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"Honestly, Eiri, I don't thi—what the hell is that sound?" Tohma asked, covering his ears as Eiri's wineglass shattered.
"Tatsuha," Eiri said grimly.
"K?" Tohma looked around, still holding his head. "Where is K? He needs to shoot the karaoke machine. Now."
---
Back by the karaoke machine again…
"Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
---
"This is the best company party I've ever been to! Count on me every year from now on!"
"Mm-hm, honey, that's nice," said Noriko. "Saki, baby, can you reach the knots for Mommy?"
"Nu-uh," answered Saki in a muffled voice. "There's a big boy in my way. And I think he's dead."
Somebody, somewhere, wriggled. "I feel like I've died and gone to heaven," said Tatsuha. "Tied up with my honey in a big bundle of love on Christmas eve!"
"If I could reach you," Eiri said menacingly, "I would kill you. Can anybody reach the," he swallowed the swear word out of deference to Saki and Noriko's legendary right-hook, "stupid rope?"
"Yuki!" Shuichi called, "Yuki, are you touching me?"
Eiri took stock. "No. I'm touching Tohma, Sakano, and Hiro. Where are you?"
"In the middle with—oh. Tatsuha, you've got me. Ryuichi is over a little more."
"Heeheehee! Somebody is tickling Kumagorou!"
The ropes tightened as somebody in the group twisted. "You perverts," Suguru said, "knock it off! I'm right here! Oh, god, don't touch over here!"
"He's not dead, Mommy," said Saki.
Squashed to one side of her husband, Mika sighed. "How are you doing on your ropes, Ark-san?" she called out.
Hogtied in the corner away from the rest of the group, Ark blinked.
"This is all my fault, Sacho," Sakano blurted out.
Tohma leaned his head on Eiri's shoulder. "If you'd like," he said. "I'm sure I'll fire you for it when we're not at a company party."
"Could you go back to being unconscious," Eiri asked Sakano. "I liked you better when you weren't kissing Tohma's…hind end…every five seconds."
"I've got a guitar pick," Hiro interrupted. "We might be able to saw our way out with that."
"Get it," Eiri said tersely.
"Only problem is it's in my pocket," Hiro went on. "Somebody's going to have to get it out for me."
---
Ten minutes later…
"How long could it take them to kiss under the stupid, freaking mistletoe?"
"Rage sent it with me from America! It's state-of-the-art! She said she wanted us to have it for the party since she was spending Christmas a~~ll alo~~~ne!"
"Oh, god."
---
"Baby, we're going to have to abandon the contemporary projectile weapons in order to bag that mistletoe."
"Oh, Claude…you don't mean…" Judy stroked his bicep and looked up at him from under her lashes.
K tipped down his sunglasses and gave her a sultry look. "Oh, I do mean."
---
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
"Hiro, give me the guitar pick so I can stab Sakuma in the throat."
"I'm not dumb," Hiro said, sawing at the ropes with the plastic pick. "You stab him, Shuichi and your brother flip out on me. And maybe Sacho over there, too."
"I'd protect you," Mika and Eiri said together.
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa---Whoosh! That sounds like fire!" Ryuichi interrupted himself.
Everybody cocked their heads to the side, listening.
"Whoosh! Whoosh!" said Kumagorou. "It sure sounds like a big fire!"
---
"Don't make me gag all of you like I did the investors!" K said cheerfully kicking the door down.
"Go ahead," Eiri called, trying to light his cigarette from some smoldering embers dropped by the flaming mistletoe as it flew overhead.
K fired indiscriminately into the crowd before launching a harpoon at the burning, whizzing bunch of mistletoe. "Aha!" he wrestled it out of the room on the harpoon line like a fisherman with a large, fighting game-fish. "Behave while I take care of business or I'll have to shoot all of you. Again!"
The door slammed shut behind him.
Eiri sighed as his cigarette finally lit. "At least it's quiet," he muttered. And then,
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"I hate Christmas," Eiri said as he and Shuichi finally escaped the party and barricaded themselves into their own home again. "And I hate parties."
"Yuuuuki!" Shuichi complained. "It was pretty good! At least we were together all night and you didn't call me a stupid brat even once while we were at the party."
Eiri smacked him over the head halfheartedly. "You're such a stupid brat," he said, falling onto the couch.
Shuichi crawled into his lap. Exashusted by the festivities, Eiri didn't bother to shove him off. "Hey, Yuki," Shuichi said, kissing his ear, "I'm pretty sure I've got a few mistletoe burns."
Eiri thought about that. "I guess I could kiss you under the mistletoe once," he said. "But it'll cost you next time," he warned as he stood with Shuichi in his arms, heading for the bedroom.
Christmas, Snipers, Snapping
"Yuki!" Shuichi planted his fists on his hips. "You have to go! It's your sister's party!"
Eiri flicked the ashes from the end of his cigarette and stared at the TV. "So?"
"I have to go!" Shuichi wailed, dropping against him dramatically. "Don't you wanna go with me, Yuki? It's Christmas Eve! A night for lovers! The most romantic night of the year!"
Eiri elbowed Shuichi's head to the side. "I hate Christmas," he said and took a long drink of beer. "And it's not Mika's party; it's an N-G event. I don't have to go."
"We could hold hands and you could kiss me under the mistletoe!"
Eiri set his beer can on Shuichi's head. "Not for two million yen," he said. "And I wouldn't go to the party, either."
Shuichi snuggled up to him. "I rented tuxedos," he said, doodling idle patterns on Eiri's chest with a fingertip. "We could help each other get dressed."
"Mm." Eiri removed his beer can and tipped his face up. "I guess I could help you get naked," he said against his mouth.
---
"Don't. You. Move." Shuichi purred, sliding up Eiri's naked body. "I'm going to prepare myself for you so close your eyes and get ready." He slithered off the bed and, double checking that Eiri's eyes were closed, reached stealthily for the tuxedo pants. "Are you ready…Yuki?" He stopped, staring at the empty bed.
"Thanks for the B-J, brat," Eiri said from behind him.
Shuichi turned around. "Yuki!" he wailed at his fully dressed lover.
Eiri, in his slightly-rumpled slacks and button-down shirt, smirked at him. "I'm going to go have a beer and watch porn while you're at Tohma's."
"Yuki!" Shuichi threw a pillow at him. "YUKI!" he screeched as the door to the bedroom blasted inward, squishing his lover to the floor.
"Aha!" said K, popping in through the smoking wreckage. "Nakano! I've secured Shindou," he said in to a walkie-talkie, scooping Shuichi up under his arm and blowing a hole in the wall behind the bed. "We're on our way to you." He put the walkie away. "As manager," K said, sounding perfectly sane, "it's my job to make sure you're not late to this important function."
He threw Shuichi into the back seat of the convertible idling in front of the house. "I'll be right back!"
"Hi, Shuichi," said Hiro, scooting over to make room.
"You're naked," said Suguru, shielding his eyes.
"That'll make a statement," said Eiri, wearing his tux and getting into the front seat.
"Yuki!" Shuichi threw himself into his lover's lap. "You're coming with!"
---
Thirty seconds earlier, in the bedroom…
"Eiri Yuki?" K asked.
Yuki lit a cigarette off the flaming door-hole. "Yeah?"
"Message from your sister," K said, un-holstering his pistol. "You come with me or she comes to get you herself.
"Fuck," said Eiri.
---
"I'm not going to do you in front of your friends," Eiri said, peeling him off and throwing him into the backseat. "Not without two million yen first," he said, looking at Suguru and Hiro over his glasses.
"God, no!"
"Not on me, sorry."
"Ack!" Shuichi clutched a pillow over his groin. "K, I'm naked!"
K gunned the engine. "Can't be helped, little man! We're running late."
He peeled away from the curb with a squeal of tires and the smell of burning rubber. "I brought him clothes," said Hiro, holding up a tuxedo. "Just in case."
"You'll make a good manager some day, Nakano," K said. "Fujisaki, take the wheel!" he ordered, climbing into the backseat.
"I can't drive!" Suguru shouted, lunging over the back of the seat and grabbing the wheel anyhow.
K stuffed Shuichi into his pants as Hiro poked his arms down the shirt sleeves. "Can't be helped, littler man!" K said. "There's a button on the wheel that controls the missile launcher—shoot anything that gets in our way."
"K-san!" Suguru squeaked. Then, "Oh, thank god! We're slowing down!"
"Go faster!" K said, choking Shuichi with his bowtie.
Suguru laughed fearfully. "I can't reach the pedals!" He kicked his feet, still dangling over the back of the front seat, for emphasis.
K put his revolver to Suguru's temple. "Faster."
Eiri blew out a cloud of smoke and slid his foot over, stepping on the gas. "Better?" he asked as Suguru shrieked.
"Good enough!" K said, climbing back into the driver's seat and cranking the wheel hard over to the left, flipping the car over and rolling it across Tohma's lawn. It landed right-side-up at the front door. K kicked his door off and grabbed the members of Bad Luck out of the back, setting them on the doorstep.
Shuichi was smoking faintly.
Hiro looked like he'd been put through a wind-tunnel.
Suguru was only standing because K was holding him up.
Eiri slouched up the walk, unruffled, and rang the bell.
Tohma opened the door. "Eiri!" he said delightedly. "You're early!"
---
"One day, Mika," Eiri said to his sister. "One day, I'll get you for this."
Mika sipped her drink and smirked at him over the rim of the glass. "Now, now, Eiri," she said mildly, smirking even more. "A lot of publishing contacts are here tonight, too. It's not just about music. Why don't you mingle? Or dance?"
"I'd rather die. I'd rather kill you," Eiri said, glaring at the crowded room.
"Eiri Yuki! My dear, it's been too long," simpered some matronly woman, giving his rear end an obvious leer.
He grabbed Mika's arm, stole her drink, knocked it back, and gave the older woman a charming smile. "It'll have to be while longer, I'm afraid; my sister insists that I dance with her."
---
"It plugs in just like this, got it? And then you don't need me and Tohma to play for you, see?"
"Yay! It's singing time!"
"Yay! Singing time! Singing time!"
"Yay!"
"Yay! Yayyayyay!"
---
"Kill it." Eiri stared at his lover and Sakuma Ryuichi as they sang along to some horrible piece of piped-in bubblegum pop.
"Oh, come on, they're both renown vocalists, Eiri," Tohma said with a smile. "There's no harm in them commandeering the karaoke machine. In fact, it's probably good for business."
Eiri ignored him, clutching the stem of his wineglass until his knuckles went white. "Kill it, Tohma."
---
Across the room at the karaoke machine...
"Pussycat Pussycat I've got flowers
and lots of hours to spent with you
So go and powder your sweet little Pussycat nose
Pussycat Pussycat I love you yes I do
you and your pussycat nose
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"Claude, honey?"
"Yeah, baby?" K scouted the room, rifle in hand.
"There seems to be a back up by the karaoke machine and I can't get through this door to stand under the mistletoe with a certain gun-toting husband of mine!" Judy giggled coyly.
---
Back by the karaoke machine…
"Pussycat Pussycat you're so thrilling
and I'm so willing to care for you
So go and make up your big little pussycat eyes
Pussycat Pussycat I love you yes I do
you and your pussycat eyes"
"What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!
What's new pussycat? Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"Honestly, Eiri, I don't thi—what the hell is that sound?" Tohma asked, covering his ears as Eiri's wineglass shattered.
"Tatsuha," Eiri said grimly.
"K?" Tohma looked around, still holding his head. "Where is K? He needs to shoot the karaoke machine. Now."
---
Back by the karaoke machine again…
"Whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
---
"This is the best company party I've ever been to! Count on me every year from now on!"
"Mm-hm, honey, that's nice," said Noriko. "Saki, baby, can you reach the knots for Mommy?"
"Nu-uh," answered Saki in a muffled voice. "There's a big boy in my way. And I think he's dead."
Somebody, somewhere, wriggled. "I feel like I've died and gone to heaven," said Tatsuha. "Tied up with my honey in a big bundle of love on Christmas eve!"
"If I could reach you," Eiri said menacingly, "I would kill you. Can anybody reach the," he swallowed the swear word out of deference to Saki and Noriko's legendary right-hook, "stupid rope?"
"Yuki!" Shuichi called, "Yuki, are you touching me?"
Eiri took stock. "No. I'm touching Tohma, Sakano, and Hiro. Where are you?"
"In the middle with—oh. Tatsuha, you've got me. Ryuichi is over a little more."
"Heeheehee! Somebody is tickling Kumagorou!"
The ropes tightened as somebody in the group twisted. "You perverts," Suguru said, "knock it off! I'm right here! Oh, god, don't touch over here!"
"He's not dead, Mommy," said Saki.
Squashed to one side of her husband, Mika sighed. "How are you doing on your ropes, Ark-san?" she called out.
Hogtied in the corner away from the rest of the group, Ark blinked.
"This is all my fault, Sacho," Sakano blurted out.
Tohma leaned his head on Eiri's shoulder. "If you'd like," he said. "I'm sure I'll fire you for it when we're not at a company party."
"Could you go back to being unconscious," Eiri asked Sakano. "I liked you better when you weren't kissing Tohma's…hind end…every five seconds."
"I've got a guitar pick," Hiro interrupted. "We might be able to saw our way out with that."
"Get it," Eiri said tersely.
"Only problem is it's in my pocket," Hiro went on. "Somebody's going to have to get it out for me."
---
Ten minutes later…
"How long could it take them to kiss under the stupid, freaking mistletoe?"
"Rage sent it with me from America! It's state-of-the-art! She said she wanted us to have it for the party since she was spending Christmas a~~ll alo~~~ne!"
"Oh, god."
---
"Baby, we're going to have to abandon the contemporary projectile weapons in order to bag that mistletoe."
"Oh, Claude…you don't mean…" Judy stroked his bicep and looked up at him from under her lashes.
K tipped down his sunglasses and gave her a sultry look. "Oh, I do mean."
---
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
"Hiro, give me the guitar pick so I can stab Sakuma in the throat."
"I'm not dumb," Hiro said, sawing at the ropes with the plastic pick. "You stab him, Shuichi and your brother flip out on me. And maybe Sacho over there, too."
"I'd protect you," Mika and Eiri said together.
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa---Whoosh! That sounds like fire!" Ryuichi interrupted himself.
Everybody cocked their heads to the side, listening.
"Whoosh! Whoosh!" said Kumagorou. "It sure sounds like a big fire!"
---
"Don't make me gag all of you like I did the investors!" K said cheerfully kicking the door down.
"Go ahead," Eiri called, trying to light his cigarette from some smoldering embers dropped by the flaming mistletoe as it flew overhead.
K fired indiscriminately into the crowd before launching a harpoon at the burning, whizzing bunch of mistletoe. "Aha!" he wrestled it out of the room on the harpoon line like a fisherman with a large, fighting game-fish. "Behave while I take care of business or I'll have to shoot all of you. Again!"
The door slammed shut behind him.
Eiri sighed as his cigarette finally lit. "At least it's quiet," he muttered. And then,
"Mistletoe, mistletoe, whoa-whoa-whoa-oh!"
---
"I hate Christmas," Eiri said as he and Shuichi finally escaped the party and barricaded themselves into their own home again. "And I hate parties."
"Yuuuuki!" Shuichi complained. "It was pretty good! At least we were together all night and you didn't call me a stupid brat even once while we were at the party."
Eiri smacked him over the head halfheartedly. "You're such a stupid brat," he said, falling onto the couch.
Shuichi crawled into his lap. Exashusted by the festivities, Eiri didn't bother to shove him off. "Hey, Yuki," Shuichi said, kissing his ear, "I'm pretty sure I've got a few mistletoe burns."
Eiri thought about that. "I guess I could kiss you under the mistletoe once," he said. "But it'll cost you next time," he warned as he stood with Shuichi in his arms, heading for the bedroom.