ciircee: (Aiba/Jun is dorky love)
[personal profile] ciircee
Firstly: The short story contest at [livejournal.com profile] ohmiya ends on 23rd May. I am hoping to have an entry.

Secondly: It is AU week over at [livejournal.com profile] sei_shoku. And it is awesome. I hope to post something for it tomorrow. I have two things, but I think I'm going to trash one. Being sick means I write angst that is emo like an angsty, emo thing. NG.

Thirdly: [livejournal.com profile] shoneenclub needs moar spam.

Finally: [livejournal.com profile] arashiroadtrip is still awesome. I'm...you guys, I think I'm totally going to bring Shun in. FOR NO REASON AT ALL. Plz send STOP. But if anybody wants something really long and awesome to read, hit up the masterlist. Erica color coded the cars and it is a thing of beauty.

Now that those are out of the way, I have to tell you that somebody censored Sesame Street's The Count. It's funny when icons of my childhood are utterly screwed with.







Jun walks into the green room at NTV and finds Ohno, Sho, and Nino crammed together on one couch and Aiba sitting on the table in front of it. There are empty lunches scattered around and Aiba is holding a magazine.

Fuck thinks Jun tiredly. He leans against the doorjamb and debates actually going in.

"So, Nino and Sho-chan have the same taste in women, huh?"

Ohno's lower lip sticks out. "No, Sho-kun and I do. Nino likes me."

"I like Satoshi, too," Sho says.

"But," says Ohno, turning wide eyes on Sho, "but we both think Nino is the cutest, right? That means you and I are the same; not you and Nino."

"Sho thinks I'm a brat," Nino interrupts. "He says all the time that I act like a little brat."

"God, that's so cute," Sho murmurs.

Jun notices that nobody takes any notice of that, aside from Nino's girlish preening.

"So if Sho thinks I'm a brat then he doesn't like me best, he likes Oh-chan the best. And since I like Oh-chan best, too, that makes me and Sho the same."

"Nino is the cutest," Ohno argues. "Sho-kun and I think Nino is tiny and cute, so that makes me and Sho the same. Because Nino is really tiny and cute."

"You're not any taller than Nino, Captain," Aiba points out reasonably. It's a sad day when Aiba is the voice of reason, Jun thinks. "And besides, Nino's not a girl. I know," Aiba goes on in a tone of one stating a scientific fact (Jun briefly puts his face in his hand because this is NEVER good). "I know that Nino isn't a girl because I've had my hands in his pants and down his shirt and twice up under his skirt." He pauses and looks reflective. "That Chinese-style dress was really tight."

"It really was," Ohno agrees at the same time Nino demands, "So?"

"So," Aiba answers Nino, "that means you and Captain are both boys and so you can't be the favorite type of girl."

"What's your favorite type of woman?" Sho asks.

Jun thinks it's really sad, in a pathetic sort of way, that he's hoping the conversation turns to boobies (Sho and Aiba don't talk about 'breasts' it's always 'boobies' when they're together and off camera. Because they're morons).

"Matsujun!" Aiba says.

It takes Jun all of five seconds to realize that Aiba is NOT greeting him. He turns around and walks to the set and stays cloistered with the director and the ADs until he absolutely has to sit on the couch with the idiots he works with. He sits as far away from Aiba as he can until Ogura politely asks if Jun is trying to sit in his lap.

Later he makes the worst mistake of his life—he can really only blame it on Those Four Morons and the way they systematically destroy his brain—and he tells Shun the whole story while they're resetting a scene. Shun interrupts him halfway through the Nino/Sho/Ohno love triangle to assure Jun that Jun has always been his favorite type of girl. Jun hits him until Shun lets go of him and goes to sit with the director and the ADs until he absolutely has to get into the scene.

(Tokuyama, who has been chatting with Shun, tells Jun that he's his favorite type of girl, too. Jun ends up pinning both Tokuyama and Shun to Shun's bathroom wall and making them take it back.)

(Being their favorite type of 'post operative New-Half' is not an improvement. It's even worse when he goes to shoot a PV with Arashi the next day and is unanimously voted their favorite New-Half ever. It's a bad day when Jun wishes they would just call him a girl.)

Wow, LJ just ate half a dozen tags because I forgot to close ONE. It ATE them. When I went back to edit they were gone. And the text after them was full of =s and duplicate words in " "s.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 09:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] starsystems.livejournal.com
SHUN. YES.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 09:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] uminohikari.livejournal.com
I LOVE SHUN FOREVER :D :D :D

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 09:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blood-opal.livejournal.com
but I think I'm going to trash one.

Do that and I'll cry at you. Forever. For srs. DDD:

re: the fic, dahdjahsdjad. ♥_____♥ How much do I love that you mentioned Ogura-san? A WHOLE LOT. (Seriously, that man must never leave Arashi.) And poor Jun. His life is so hard. But at least he's everyone's favourite girl. That's gotta count for something. :DDD (Though I still think Sho looks the hottest in a dress. Nothing can beat those sloping shoulders, okay. ._.b)

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 09:49 pm (UTC)
ext_30559: (Default)
From: [identity profile] fluttering.livejournal.com
Jun thinks it's really sad, in a pathetic sort of way, that he's hoping the conversation turns to boobies (Sho and Aiba don't talk about 'breasts' it's always 'boobies' when they're together and off camera. Because they're morons).

Is so beautiful I could cry. sjdflsfls;

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 10:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nicefinalbeam.livejournal.com
THAT VIDEO IS SO DISTURBINGLY HILARIOUS. *cries*

Matsujun is so manly. ♥

ps: bring Shun into roadtrip! I BELIEVE IN YOU.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-14 11:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kailice.livejournal.com
A while ago, my friends and I were watching Sesame Street in our hotel room, and Ernie was singing one of his rubber ducky songs in the bath with everyone. As in, others were in the bath singing with him. But then, the Cookie Monster tried to teach kids to eat their fruits and vegetables ;o;

Poor Jun. Life is hard when your bandmates are idiots.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-15 12:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rinalin.livejournal.com
*giggles* Arashi in your hands is always just so hilarious in their love for one another. It makes me happy.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-15 03:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] waxrose.livejournal.com
Matsujun is my favourite type of girl, too. :D :D :D

I love your fic SO MUCH. ♥

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-15 06:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ruisetsuna.livejournal.com
sdkjdsfsdd; Oh, Jun. He's everyone's favorite type of girl ♥

(no subject)

Date: 2009-05-15 11:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alexiela.livejournal.com
A big YES to Shun in the Arashi Road Trip ♥

Oh Jun, you're a gorgeous girl and you're my favorite too XD

(no subject)

Date: 2009-07-05 11:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] flange5.livejournal.com
Being their favorite type of 'post operative New-Half' is not an improvement. It's even worse when he goes to shoot a PV with Arashi the next day and is unanimously voted their favorite New-Half ever. It's a bad day when Jun wishes they would just call him a girl

I'm late to the party, of course and creepily fic-stalking, but I just wanted to say I loce this and you are awesome. &hearts

Also: 'slowly, slowly, slowly going faster, once I start ***ing, I really cannot stop'

I cannot tell you how much I love this video. I have no idea why I love it so much when my childhood is rendered completely perverse and epic, but that's the way my brain was warped. And I had almost forgotten this video before you posted it here.

So thank you for pretty much single-handedly making my weekend ^_^

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Circe

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